Resignation isn't funny

So...for the two of you that read this you have probably noticed I haven't thrown down some snarkiness in awhile. The reason for this is that I have passed over into another place. Before I was in the "my job is lame and my managers are douches but it's kinda funny how lame it is so lets bitch about it" place. Now I'm in the "my job is lame and my managers are the biggest fuckers on the planet and I hate this place so much I want to rip my eyes out which is NOT funny" place. I have been lacking the drive to hilariously recap the daily events at the IR, and I have been applying for every single job I think I could possibly qualify for trying to GET OUT. However as per a request or two, I will try to drum something up here....

One of the (many) things that drive me crazy about this place is how the "guests" fucking stupid customers walk all over us and we just fucking take it and beg for more. Two recent examples; A few weeks ago I answered a call when I was doing to go:

"Thank you for calling the Italian Restaurant, this is Waitress how can I help you?"

"Yes, my wife and I were just there for dinner and everything was really great, but I gotta tell ya the air was just on way too high, it was really cold and it kinda ruined our meal."

What I was thinking was "you are a piece of shit who wants something for free and 1) restaurants are always cold, everyone knows this, bring a fucking coat and 2) did you ask for anyone to turn the air down? Or you just thought you would wait until you got home and whine over the phone like a little pussy?"

But what I said was "Did you want to speak to a manager?"

And he says "Yes! I would!" all fucking cheery like he is obviously not upset but excited about the gift card he is about to get.

Of course the manager pussed-out and gave him a freaking gift card, which irritated me even more. At least the time when the lady complained about a crying baby the manager got her to hang up before caving with a gift card. Recently someone even called and complained that they had gotten a to go order and it was really dry, didn't have enough sauce. When did this take place? Oh yeah, that would be over a month ago. Can you imagine getting a takeout order, thinking it could have used more sauce, and then over a month later deciding to call and bitch about it. WHO DOES THAT?! Obviously they knew they would get something for free, it's not like they just wanted to let us know, or it really affected them so deeply they have been unable to sleep for weeks thinking about their horrible dry pasta. They probably were talking to a friend and I imagine had a conversation somewhat like this:

Fucker Customer 1: "Dude, the other day we were eating at the Italian Restaurant and my mom didn't like her dish and got all bitchy about it and said none of the food was that good and the manager took all the dishes off, it was awesome!"

Fucker Customer 2: "Whoa, that IS awesome! I got some food there like a month ago and it was good and everything but I wonder if I bitched about it if it would have been free"

FC1: "Aw man you should have, I bet they would hook you up with a free meal, you should just call them now!"

FC2: "I don't know, it was like a month ago"

FC1: "Dude just do it, they wont say no, just tell them you wont eat there ever again and shit"

And so Fucker Customer 2 calls and gets a fucking gift card! I hate this place! They think "oh no, we have to give them gift cards and make them happy or they wont come back and they will tell their friends!"

Yeah, they will tell their friends all right, tell them to come walk all over us and get free shit!

The other recent instance of this was a largish party (about 10-15) that came in on a weekday night. They were apparently germophobes because they told their servers they wanted all their drinks in Styrofoam to-go cups and they would be using the plastic to-go silverware and napkins (where is that crying Native American when you need him?!). Later in their meal when they had entrees they started wigging out. Most of them left the table and went outside. The servers went over to see what was amiss and one of the men told them that there was a fly in the room and it had landed on some of their plates and that is so disgusting that they were repulsed, and left the restaurant having lost their appetites. The servers sent the manager out and he went through and pointed out which plates the fly had contaminated (about half of them) and she took them off the check. He then said "Also, he (indicating another of his party) had his drink spilled on him, can you do something about that? Take ten percent off or something?" Of course the manager took that drink off, and afterward the servers told her that what happened was they set his drink in front of him in the Styrofoam cup with a lid as per their request, and he tried to stick the straw in the wrong side of the lid and knocked it onto his own lap. So pretty much he wanted (and got) his drink comped because he spilled it on himself. GRRRRR. there is no dignity to be had in this place!!

So there you have it, and I actually meant to tell another story but I will save that for next time, it will give me another thing to talk about. but it includes one of the newer servers being a total fuckwad and threatening another server. To be continued...